Our minds are like a rudder. I challenge you to find one single area of your daily life that is not controlled by your perceptions and thoughts. But do you realize that you can change your thoughts? We humans form and change habits rather readily. We are able to adapt our perceptions and attain completely new patterns of thought. The past few days, I have been struggling in my thought life. I let a deceptive thought creep in and I get tired of fighting it; tired of telling it to leave. I just grow accustomed to letting that thought become a pattern.
I’m fat and I embarrass my friends and family by eating.
People don’t need food and if I were strong enough, I wouldn’t need to eat.
Eating is a sin and God will punish me for everything I’ve ever consumed.
These distorted thought patterns invade my mind until they eventually transform my behaviors. Robyn has been telling me to remember my values. The things that I want to accomplish; things that I know I cannot accomplish unless I let go of my tight grip on my eating habits. So Mark and I made a list today: my Values and Future Goals. It’s written out and hung on the wall right at the kitchen sink so it will literally be in my face as I’m preparing my meals.
It’s a mix of short-range resolutions (behavioral changes) and long-range goals, but it’s :
1. Become a mother
2. Finish my PhD
3. Become a certified personal trainer (possibly AAAI to start; NASM down the road)
4. Reach and maintain 115 pounds
5. Increase body fat percentage to a minimum of 15%
6. Earn an income from blogging
7. Become a published book author
8. Become homeowners
….and the most specific short-range behavioral changes….
9. Spend an entire week (7 days) eating 1800-1900 calories per day
10. Spend an entire week (7 days) exercising a maximum of 5 days per week, 60 minutes per day. This means 2 rest days this week and rest days will be total rest (no yoga practice; no elliptical sessions).
The reason I’m telling you is so i have accountability; somewhere to come back and check in. The internet has been notified so now it’s a real committment.
Any change worth making is going to be scary.